Day 1 ♥ Letter To My Best Friend

I’ve known you for only a year now, wait its going on two. win =) But I love you so much for being in my life. I dont know what I would do without you. Well I am, with us living in different states now, its the hardest thing ever.


When I needed to cry on someone’s shoulder, you were there. When I needed someone to take random trips with me, you were there. When I needed someone just to sit in the room with me and not say anything… you were there. And I still enjoyed every bit of your company.


I have plenty of close friends. But you stand out. I NEVER have to think twice about what I want to say to you, it could be the most outlandish thing and not even for a second would you judge me, have the time it was always a ”Me too!” I remember when I first met you, I didn’t like you to much. Seemed like just another rude New Yorker. It wasn’t until that one night at the studio where we became close. And each trip to the studio we became closer. There was never a time when i got tired of being around you. I think, yeah there was once. When we had that falling out. I wanted to talk shit about you, but the only person I wanted to talk to was you. Then that day when Mel’s instigating ass made us talk when I had to get my shit from you. First thing you said was ”I missed you Drea” … yeaahh thats right. I won bitch.


 What other friend cries for you when you get hurt, feels the pain you do and not even in the same state. I love you, I haven’t seen you in a year. It kills me. Come back to me Johnnie.


P.s : bring your hair supplies. =D

Ignorance is Bliss

when are we really happy? Are we happy when we know that things can't go wrong. When we don't know any better or better yet, the truth.

A baby always seem so happy because they can't comprehend the cruelties of reality. everything is at peace for them.

Now when a loved one hurts you, and your afraid to let that person go.... its then you wish for that ignorance to remain in that euphoria of happiness. To continue on and wish to deal with the pain a later time. Point is, truth hurts. Ignorance is bliss..... where would you rather be?

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10 Steps Back

I never thought I would be back in this situation. Feeling like there's a part of me missing because I gave so much. So much I feel like i was left with nothing. As a deep part of me wants everything to be back to normal, but I know that this was for the better.

The lies. The smiles. The yelling. The Kisses.

I could be happy and complain about them all. But I sit here. Trying not to cry. Thinking of a way I fill the place you once held. Because I was so close to that happiness that i always wanted. Now it all seems like a false hope.

This all too familiar pain that I never wanted to feel again. Because of that who knows how long this one would take.

heartless ♥ romantic 

Where do we go from here.

I know I made some mistakes
but theres still something about me worth holding on to,
something left to help me grow.

But baby, you have to do your part and let go. 

Let go and let love happen.

Mistakes are meant to be learned from.

                   I learned. 

heartless ♥ romantic 

written by anonymous....

Some may say that I have it good and others would say that I am taking advantage of my situation. Truth be told... I really don't know how to handle the most important part of my life, my relationship. I am so engulfed in what others may call a game or even me being a hoe that it seems like my body is creeping up and taking control of who I am and who I want to be... I love him I do but there is this man, a slightly older man that is starting to cloud my better judgment. I'm not sure what it is about him but all I know is that when I am around him, something inside of me wants to "get loose" as he would say. Over the years I have learned to tame the promiscuous urges that so often made me want to hit it and quit it like a nigga fresh out looking for his first hit back on the street. Yet recently I have gone to extremes to see what it would be like to unleash that sexual being within and I have learned that she is more than happy being tamed. For when the time comes for her to unleash her rath, all will be well and she will be more than satisfied with the man she is with, my man. January 2010 has rolled around and I have come to the conclusion that there will be no more games, no more pondering whether or not this move is the right move. He who has my heart shall have all of me till death do us part. It seems so funny now to say something like that when YOU are still on my mind, yet and still I know that nothing could ever come of this. So in the end it seemed that the best friend was the one telling me to do it for me and never to regret it. I have no regrets in life only urges that were taken farther than expected but never unwanted. Old habits die hard they say, yet I'm on cloud nine. Where are you?! ;-)

heartless ♥ romantic

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Saltue To The New Year

2010 rolled around....

had to bring it in wit the best...

"you want a barbie b.tch.....go get her #"

and pretty wasted ...

for some Boston girls....

we turned NY out....

"look at them lips. i gotta kiss 'em...you blow kush, come hit this swisha"

AND...without the BULLSHIT.

heartless ♥ romantic